By Mark Adcock
In Psalm 27:13, the Psalmist speaks about the fact that though life has been hard, he is still confident he will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.
For a while, during this pandemic, I knew this to be true in my heart. But my mind was slow to comprehend it.
On March 29, my father died of COVID-19. Then 10 days later, my mother died with this dreaded virus as well.
At first, I was pretty confident. But as the days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months without a funeral or a normal season of grief and mourning, I must confess my confidence began to wane.
I know my life has been affected in ways many have not had to experience — and I am thankful they have not. But it seems all the chaos of this last six months has taken its toll on many, even if they have not had to endure the kind of loss I have. Have you lost your spiritual confidence?
Some have told me to just hang on and that time will heal. But a friend told me years ago that time doesn’t heal. Rather, God heals in time. And this has become my testimony. God is at work restoring my confidence that can say by faith, “I believe in the goodness of the Lord, and I am once again seeing it in the land of the living.”
Perhaps you might think this testimony of mine is just me trying to put some kind of religious spin on hardship and suffering. But honestly I have experienced the Lord’s goodness even as I have mourned.
I won’t soon forget the afternoon when after months of social distancing, I was able to take my almost 2-year-old grandson, Carson, into my arms and hug him.
I knew it would be powerful for me. But when I took him into my arms, he hugged me and wouldn’t let go for several minutes. And all the while, he had the biggest smile on his face. In that moment, I saw the goodness of the Lord.
As my congregation has begun to come back together for worship, I have sensed a new love and appreciation for church family and corporate worship. It has been a tremendous blessing.
In these gatherings, even with social distancing, I am finding the ability to be thankful for the goodness of the Lord. And while we are more physically distant than we want to be, God is not distant at all.
Then recently, I received a phone call from my good friend Bob. I knew he was really sick and in the ICU at the hospital.
He and I are about as different as different can be. I have spent the last three years caring for him and trying to convince him that God is good and that He loves him. When I answered the phone Bob said to me, “I called to tell you something, and I am going to cry. The doctors just told me that I am dying … and I wanted to make sure I told you that I love you.”
We both cried. I have been praying for Bob for three years. Then I asked, “Do you know where you are going to spend eternity?” His response did not surprise me because it has often been the subject of our conversations: “I am afraid I am going to hell.”
I told him that he needn’t have fear in dying, if he would pray and receive Jesus and confess his sin, then God would soon welcome him. Then, he asked me, “Will you help me do that?”
A nurse came in and held his hand as he voiced his prayer. In that moment, my friend Bob came to know Jesus. And the next day, Bob saw Him face to face.
Friends, I have had a very difficult 2020. But I am still confident of this, I will see (and have seen) the goodness of the Lord in this, the land of the living.
