GREENFIELD — Each night, Shannon Helsley snuggles up to a stuffed teddy bear that can play the sound of her son Tyler’s heartbeat.
It’s one of the most treasured things she owns, since her adult son was taken off life support on July 17 at Hancock Regional Hospital in Greenfield.
That day, she held her 28-year-old son’s hand as a donor coordinator pushed his body on a gurney down the halls of the hospital, on the way to the surgery room where doctors would take the organs that would save four people’s lives.
It’s a day the mother of three will never forget.
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More than 100 staff members from all over the hospital lined the halls as Helsley and her son made the long journey through the corridors, where reverent strangers stood quietly against the walls, many of them bowing their heads in prayer.
“It made me feel good that they were there for him, but it’s something you never want to go through with your child,” she said.
She finds solace in knowing Tyler’s decision to be an organ donor ended up saving the lives of four people. All are women: one in her 30s, two in their 40s and one in her 60s.
Helsley, who lives on the south side of Indianapolis, is amazed what a tremendous impact it can make when people simply check a box on their drivers license saying they wish to be a donor.
“I don’t remember if Tyler signed up to be a donor because I was, or if I signed up because he was, but we did it together,” said Helsley, 49, who has always been a huge advocate for organ donation.
Thirteen years ago, her older brother, Andy Williams, received a kidney from their younger brother, Danny Williams.
Last month, Helsley got a letter from an anonymous recipient who had received one of her son’s kidneys. “She said it’s working beautifully,” she said.
When Helsley saw the letter in her mailbox with a return address from the Indiana Donor Network — the state’s nonprofit organ recovery organization — she cried before she ever opened the envelope.
“I had happy tears and sad tears,” she said.
While organ recipients and donors’ families don’t know each other’s names, they have the opportunity to meet if both parties choose to.
Helsley said it would be an honor to meet the women whose lives Tyler saved.
“That’s what keeps me going, knowing he’s still out there, helping people, because that’s what he always did,” she said.
Being an organ donor fell right in line with her son’s generous nature, Helsley said.
“He would give the shirt off his back,” she said, recalling the day they stood in line at a Dollar General store, and the customer at the register didn’t have enough money to pay for his things.
Tyler handed the man a $5 bill and declined to take back any change.
“He didn’t know this person, but that’s how he was. If he has it, he’s going to help you,” his mom recalled.
Tyler Helsley graduated from Morristown High School but had been living in Greenfield since his early 20s. He had been working for his uncle’s company, which builds high-end billiards tables.
The last time Shannon Helsley saw her son was on this past Fourth of July. They met at the Speedway gas station just off I-70 and Mt. Comfort Road, so Tyler could give his mom some clothes his girlfriend no longer needed.
He gave his mom a big hug when they said goodbye. “Every time he saw me I got a hug — a hug hello and a hug goodbye,” she recalled in a recent interview, clutching onto the bear that the donor network gave her.
Three days after they met at the Speedway station, she got a call around 8 a.m. that her son was in trouble. She happened to be off work that day from Indianapolis Bakery, where she’s worked for the past 20 years. She rushed from her home to the hospital in Greenfield, where her son had been taken by ambulance.
That was July 7, the day Tyler went into cardiac arrest and never regained consciousness.
His mother would spend the next week in the hospital, wrestling with the decision of whether to disconnect her son from life support.
Despite doctors telling her Tyler had very little brain activity and would never be the same, “I wasn’t ready to let him go,” she said. “Sometimes I feel like I should have waited longer, but I knew he could save some lives, and he did.”
After a week of holding vigil by his bedside, “that’s when I told them I’ll let him go rest,” she said.
Tyler remained on life support three more days as the Indiana Donor Network lined up recipients. On July 17, his mom held his hand as he was escorted down the long hallway leading to the surgical room, where he would be taken off mechanical support.
While the day was heartbreaking, Shannon Helsley finds solace in knowing that four other people are able to wake up each morning and live their lives, thanks to her son.
“We honor Tyler’s selfless decision to become an organ donor,” said Adam Wilhelm, Hancock Regional Hospital’s director of nursing administration.
Though the hospital often has tissue donors, having organ donors at Hancock Regional is much more rare, he said. Only three people have donated organs there in the past 15 years. Wilhelm was there to witness Shannon Helsley walk alongside her son that day.
“It was amazing to witness something so hopeful and selfless happen during such a sad time. I encourage everyone to sign up to be an organ donor. It is such a wonderful legacy,” he said.
Every day, 22 people die waiting on a life-saving organ, Wilhelm said. “I would ask everyone to consider following Tyler’s lead and register to be a donor. You might just save a life. If you’re like Tyler, you’ll save four,” he said.
Today, Helsley is happy to tell anyone she knows about the life-saving importance of organ donation.
“What I tell people is, that shouldn’t even be a question — you just do it,” she said. “You don’t need them when you’re gone.”
For her family, knowing Tyler saved lives provides comfort in the midst of the ongoing heartbreak felt by losing a loved one too soon.
His mom said Tyler was a stereotypical middle child, brother to Josh Fentress, 31; and Halee Helsley, 23; as well as Stormy Helsley, 18.
“He was a handful,” she said, but he was also a delight.
Her grandson, 3-year-old Bentlee, reminds a lot of people of his Uncle Tyler — both in looks and mannerisms.
“Bentlee loved him a lot. He still calls all the guys he sees Ty Ty,” said Helsley, who is in the process of building a wall display to memorialize her son.
The display will include the mahogany box of his ashes, along with photographs and a medal from the Indiana Donor Network.
The teddy bear that holds Tyler’s heartbeat will probably stay with her, said Helsley, who has dressed the bear to resemble her son.
The bear is wearing a pair of shorts that belonged to his nephew Bentlee, and a shirt Tyler wore as a baby. “We cut the sleeves away, just like he always did,” his mom said.
The bear is also wearing a backwards baseball cap, just like he did, and a silver chain with a crucifix.
On the bear’s left wrist are two black elastic hair bands, and a tiny replica of a silver bracelet, just like Tyler always wore.
His mom now wears his bracelet on her left wrist, along with two black elastic hair bands, and she never plans to take them off.
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The Indiana Donor Network is the state’s organ recovery organization, one of 58 similar nonprofit organizations nationwide.
The network’s mission is saving and enhancing the quality of life through organ, tissue and eye donation and transplantation.
According to the network:
–Nearly 1,300 Hoosiers and more than 114,000 people nationwide are waiting for lifesaving organ transplants. That’s enough to fill Lucas Oil Stadium almost twice. In the U.S., another person is added to the transplant waiting list every 10 minutes. Each day 20 people die because a donated organ wasn’t available in time.
–Almost every person can be a donor. Interested people should not rule themselves out due to age or any medical condition. Physicians will determine at the time of death what organs and tissues can be donated.
–Each patient waiting for an organ transplant is listed with the United Network for Organ Sharing (UNOS), the agency responsible for ensuring that donated organs are distributed fairly. When a donor is identified, the donor’s blood type, tissue type, body weight, size, etc., are matched against the list of patients currently waiting for transplant. In addition, the recipient’s severity of illness and time on the waiting list are factored into the matching process.
–When medical professionals in an Indiana hospital identify a potential donor, they use a 24-hour number to contact Indiana Donor Network. Representatives from Indiana Donor Network then assist the referring hospital and the donor family with the medical, legal and ethical aspects of donation.
–The time a patient spends on the waiting list for an organ can vary from a few days to several years. The length of a patient’s wait is affected by several factors, including the urgency of his or her medical condition and the availability of donated organs. Tissue banks have a very limited supply of donated skin, bone, heart valves, tendons and corneas. All patients awaiting an organ or tissue transplant depend on the generosity of others.
–You can register your decision to be an organ and tissue donor online at indianadonornetwork.org or at a Bureau of Motor Vehicles (BMV) branch. Please share your decision to be a donor with your family.
–The identity of both the donor and the recipient is confidential. Indiana Donor Network will provide the donor’s family with basic information about the recipients, such as age and gender. Some donor family members and recipients choose to communicate anonymously, and Indiana Donor Network facilitates this process. If both the donor family and recipient elect in writing to meet each other, Indiana Donor Network can help facilitate this meeting.
For more information, visit indianadonornetwork.org or contact the center at:
Indiana Donor Network
3760 Guion Road
Indianapolis, IN 46222
317-685-0389
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